The voice activated map system set on my phone was
all set to direct me home. I was panting to listen to a praise and worship cd I’d
received as a gift just moments before my pilgrimage began. Then, an odd thing
happened. The phone map steered me to turn on I 40 West. “What? No I don’t want
to go that way. I’ll never get home going in that direction.” I stopped and
pulled up the map. Yes, this route would be the best way. I wanted to fight the
voice directing commands but I surrendered.
There was a problem with me, not the map system.
Because of a family struggle I was not welcome in the direction of I 40 West. The
voice kept shouting the town where I needed to turn left, the very place which
had become my “forbidden city.” Just the mention of the place made me weep.
Then the revelation started unfolding. The words on the cd were blaring. “Be still.
I will carry you. I will mount you up on wings of eagles, and bring you joy.
Rest in My love.” Were these just words on a cd? No. God strategically planted
the lyrics for that moment in time. I was heaving crying. In the depths of my
soul I wanted to go I 40 West. I grieved because there was an imaginary sign
flashing, “No Trespassing” in the direction I was being mapped to travel. Would
life always hold this neon sign before me? Would I forever be kept from people
I truly loved? The answers to these questions still remain a mystery. Yet the
solution to my dilemma was wrapped up in the lyrics – words straight from
Scripture.
God knows my plight. He’s familiar with the grief
and longing in my heart to be close to those I love with every fiber of my
being. I would lay down my life for them. However, right now they are out of my
reach. My Deliverer whispers the words from the stereo sound. His Truth makes
its way from my ears to the depths of my soul, my spirit.
My journey home routed me in the right direction,
back into the arms of resting in my Beloved. I am still. Carried on the wings
of an unseen eagle. I am home.
“Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10