A New Thing

On an early morning walk I allowed solitude to take me back into history. The history was past memories. Corners of my mind crept out carrying a painful past, painting pictures with hues of deep slate, ebony, onyx. The broad strokes were dark and the fine strokes were even darker. The music I could hear in the background was a dirge emerging into a crescendo that made me want to close my eyes and deafen my ears. My heart ached and I wanted to find an eraser to wipe the canvas clean, a gong to stop ballad of lament. I realized the enemy of my soul was laughing. I bought the lie to replay the tapes, the scenes of hurt I caused and the pillaging of my heart by others. My feet began to drag as well as my emotions. I realized I had a choice. I could set up camp at this dreadful place or I could run.
Funny thing-- just a few days ago I just delivered a sermon on how God wants to do a new thing in our lives. I had to ask myself how can God do a new thing if I chain myself to the past. God won't force me to take the chains off. However, His Word promises that He desires to give me a future bright with promise. New colors can dot the canvas, brilliant with yellow, gold and red. A song and dance with joyful tones, swift and lifting movements can swirl around me. I can be carried away by the One who loves me most, who restores my soul, and who dines with me as I feast in His Word. He has a future that includes goodness, promises of hope, mourning that is turned to dancing.
Isaiah 43:19 says, "See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."
I have decided I would rather look expectantly for the new thing than live in the past. This is a new day!

Vortex

A vortex is a spinning, often turbulent, flow of fluid. The spinning action forms a cavity or vacuum in it's center and draws objects into the action. One definition in Webster's is- something that resembles a whirlpool "the hellish ~ of battle - Time ". My mind grasps the whirlpool concept. But my heart knows the vortex experience caused by a "hellish battle of time."
Our minds, wills, and emotions can be drawn into a vortex when: we believe we have plenty of good years left but our employer retires us ten years too early: our desk is pregnant with bills, our bank account is barren of funds; the white picket fence we erect around a precious relationship has turned into a stone wall between us and the other party; the child we birthed and nursed wouldn't take a glass of milk from us if we were the last person on earth; the loving heart of someone we cherish has turned into a vinegar soaked sponge. When we allow the "hellish battle of time" to continue, destruction is inevitable. Everything we think, feel, and act on emerges from the vortex, the whirlpool. When the whirlpool is a cesspool we become toxic. Objects engulfed in this kind of whirlpool wind up a stinking mess. Stinking thinking produces stinking living. Only we can make the choice not to get sucked up in this flurry of activity. 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 says that we can demolish strongholds, arguments, and pretensions against God by taking our thoughts captive and obedient to Christ. This is the only warfare tactic that will keep us close and clean.

Dark Nights

I've often heard, "It's always the darkest before the dawn." At times this has brought comfort to me. I know dawn comes day after day without fail. Always has, always will. However, when life throws me a round of hurts, failures and disappointments I begin to wonder when the inning will be over. Should I count on one, two, or even more curve balls before the day ends? I lay in bed at night knowing that tomorrow will bring the dawn of a new day but will it bring dawn to the dark night of my soul? I begin to question God's remembrance of me.
I've heard God has a load limit sign on me. Nothing is able to come my way that will destroy me--unless I choose destruction. By faith I choose to believe that my God is able to sustain me-- no matter how long the darkness lasts, no matter how many rounds of curveballs are thrown, no matter if life makes any sense at all. By faith I trust God loves me, will hold my hand in uncertain times, and will even carry me till the dawn comes. And it will come!

Before It's Time

My dad was an alcoholic. I choose not to drink. I figure if I can't stop at one chocolate chip cookie my self control with alcohol may not be any better. I have friends that enjoy a glass of wine on special occasions. Not trusting myself to know if I could stop at just one glass, I dare not explore unknown territory. Some people say wine is safe. I wonder since I "whine" to much if I would wine too much as well. In that case the term, "No wine before it's time" could hold true with my whine problem as well. I need not whine over an outcome before the end of the story has passed. At times I tend to be the person who says the glass is half empty instead of half full. I start revving the whining engines when my glass starts getting empty, when things don't go my way, when people start walking away. Friends and family have to remind me the end of the story has not come. Time has a way of changing people, places, and outcomes. A whine before it's time is just as unpleasant to the ears as a wine before it's time is to the palate. Pessimism hovers when I forget my Sovereign Creator is the One who begins a good work in each of us and is faithful to complete the work. He may complete the story with a different ending than I desire. In that case I need not whine too much or wine too much. His timetable is different than mine. I just need to trust Him!

Vav Adversative

Reading broadens our vocabulary. As of late I am into a book on lamenting. I have learned a new term from the Hebrew language called a vav adversative. My computer keyboard keeps me from typing it correctly. The best description I can give for the term is that it contains an exclamation point ! with a tilde ~ on the top left side. This character looks like a flagpole with the flag flying in the opposite direction. If I were to draw a flag I would make a pole with the fabric flying from left to right. This Hebrew character looks like the wind is blowing the fabric from right to left. Sometimes the vav adversative is used in Scripture to represent antithetical or adverse ideas. An idea is presented, then followed by the word "but" and everything changes. The wind blows in a different direction without warning and the scenery changes.
My life is like that. Everything seems to be going in my favor and then a mighty wind comes up from nowhere. I get knocked off my feet, broadsided, or I lose my balance. One day I am whistling down the hallway and the next I am in excruciating pain, mourning, lamenting. The dam bursts and my tears flow freely and often.
We've all been there at some point -- a death, divorce, job loss, run away child, a miscarriage... How great is the day when the wind eventually shifts and the flag flies again in the way we enjoy it. We can't keep our flag at half mast forever. We learn to set our sails in the direction the wind is blowing. We may have to go with an uncomfortable flow until a change comes or the tide does.
Life can throw us plenty of "vav adversatives". What we do with them determines our outlook, our mood, and whether we sink or swim. Today I am going to swim!

Just Right

My mother used to tell me bedtime stories as a child. Goldilocks was always a favorite. She was a gutsy little girl who should never have trespassed into the home of the three bears. I envisioned her slipping through the doors and being frightened for her safety. While fear would have been a more predominant feeling for me, hunger was the overriding feature for little Goldi. Her eyes rested on the bowls of soup and she dove right into the first bowl-- too hot; the second bowl--too cold; and alas the third being just right. My words and speech seem to fit into those same three categories and numerous times in precisely the same order. Burning, chilling, or pleasant to the listener.
The chairs came next. After filling her belly, the child decided to rest a bit. If television or Gameboys had been available Miss Locks would have helped herself to those as well. I am sure of that. Of course the size of the chair was all important. Do we think she was a bit spoiled? The first and second chairs were too big while the third proved to be just right. I have placed myself in jobs that were much bigger than I had skills for. These jobs left me in need of a time out just as our featured character, Goldilocks.
Perhaps boredom or the need for an afternoon siesta led the child into the bedroom. Trying out the beds, she found the first too hard, the second too soft and the third just right. Many a night I have crawled into bed when insomnia took over. The hard situations of life have left my mind racing even though my body was fatigued. There have been nights when the soft pleasures of the day have kept me awake while I rehearsed, re-inacted and relished a most wonderful event I have experienced. Fortunate is the night finding me in a restful sleep. These nights only come when I give everything over to God. When I surrender all of my words, my jobs, and even the pleasant experiences of life, will everything be just right.
Goldilocks jeopardized her life by going somewhere she was never meant to go. In the end she fled for her life when the bears awoke her.
This story is just child's play however I believe we can relate to each scene. If we stop and think of similar situations in our own lives we may learn some great lessons. Where we go, what we do, think, and say all have repercussions.

The Waiting Place

Everyone waits. No one is exempt in this life from a period of waiting for someone, or some event to take place. Dr. Seuss says this in "Oh, The Places You'll Go"- "The Waiting Place...for people just waiting. Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come or a plane to go...waiting for a Yes or No...or waiting, perhaps for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants or a wig with curls or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting.
Have you ever felt like you were in the runner's position on the starting line when the announcer proclaims from his megaphone, "Runners take your mark. On your mark, get set,WAIT"? Yes I said wait. We all want to hear the word Go! But how often do we we get red led lights instead of green? Are you familiar with these words,"Your business is very important to us. However, all of our representatives are busy right now. Please stay on the line until..." My response is "When it snows in the Bahamas or someplace further south than that." If a poll was taken most people probably would not get an award for doing the Waiting Place very well. Impatience is costly. Just ask the person who has run one to many red lights, broken out of prison, spoken out of turn, turned a fist instead of a listening ear, walked away from a relationship before someone came near, fessed up, got right or was never guilty in the first place. Waiting is as difficult for the most seasoned adult as it is an impetuous child on Christmas Eve. The waiting room of a hospital can seem as cruel as the waiting cell in a prison. Waiting for a promise to be kept can feel more frightening than if it had been broken. Why? Because what we do in the waiting place is crucial. Who or what we put our trust in will determine our attitude and our character. Other people will let us down. We will let ourselves down. Outcomes let us down. The Waiting place can be the most beneficial place if we wait well. What does not waiting well look like? We can fight. Just put on those boxing gloves labeled anger and bitterness and start punching. We can use might- manipulate, pay off somebody, undermine another or show off our stuff. We can take a flight from a person, a dream, or from God. Is there another alternative? Yes! Delight yourself in the Lord. Trust the Creator of the universe while He is creating you into a person much stronger, more faithful, more mature than you ever dreamed possible. Dr. Seuss says The Waiting Place is a useless place. For some people that may prove to be true. Let us resolve for it to be our most useful place in life!